There are so very many reasons why I am tired tired tired of
body commentary in the blogosphere.
It is mainly because while I am plus sized girl – the last time I was a
size twelve, I WAS twelve – there is more to me than my size and how I feel
about it. In fact the only time I
am reminded of it is when other people point it out (rude and their own issue)
or I feel unhealthy. When this
happens I generally address it by changing my eating habits, starting to walk and swim more or enter into an exercise or counseling program. Just like people who are not plus
sized. This creates me as normal.
Opinions and articles out there range from what is wrong
with us at a given size, to how a woman feels about being a given size, to the
politics of being a given size, to why it is okay to be a given size. I mostly agree with the latter (as long
as one is healthy, size does not matter).
There is another category and I never quite know what to say or how to
feel about it. I am not sure I get
to weigh in on this one because I am white, but I certainly have some thoughts on it. So if I offend you with this, so be it.
May 6th, 2012 the New York Times Op Ed section
ran an article called Black Women and Fat by Alice Randall, who I normally like. In it, she remarks that Black women are
fat because their men want them that way (um. What?) and therefore they want to be fat (um. What?!!?). She cites historic references to poetry remarking on the
beauty of big-hipped black woman.
I got no problem with the poetry.
I got a problem with Alice Randall’s interpretation of it. She interprets the poetry as further
evidence of A.E. Shaw’s book “The Embodiment of Disobedience: Fat Black Women’s Unruly Political Bodies.” Shaw
argues it this way: “Fat black woman can be a rounded opposite of the fit black
slave,” and thus creates a remark on the prosperity of the Fatter Woman, much
like Samoa. The heavier you are,
the richer you are (less work).
She also goes on to encourage her community of women to get
fit, although the terminology she uses is to “get smaller.” I am a fan of the fit, not the smaller
because genetics are not even mentioned, nor is a person’s natural size.
First, I think having an opinion is a good thing. Second, I don’t think extrapolating
size to an entire culture is.
Third, making excuses based on race is never a good idea, and finally my
feminism is outraged at the idea that I become fat and unhealthy in order to
keep a man. What a crock of
shit! That asks an entire race to
collude in its own oppression because of sexism. And that if you are a skinny black woman you are somehow not
black enough (as written about by xojane). Bringing me to the idea that weight is
a race issue. Um. No.
Curvy CEO says she is tired of the “what is wrong with Blackwomen” meme. I agree. I am also tired of the “what is wrong
with fat women” meme. Exercise is a luxury for many women in that no one has
time. It is also expensive, except for walking and running. (And I don’t run. Ever.) If there are kids in the picture, their
needs come first, and for many women, regardless of race, this is a truth. To be chastised for not caring
about themselves enough is just insult to injury.
Body size is an ongoing issue in that social comparison is
an ongoing issue. It isn’t about
race, or men, or women. I have
reached an age where, when I see a lovely woman, or a good-looking man, I
simply tell them. It doesn’t take
anything away from me to give a compliment. My success is not dependent on someone else’s failure. So, lets stop. Lets stop with the “this is whys” and
the “here is how I fixed myself” and the race politics of image.
Image matters.
Image matters in that when we feel good we look good. Enough with the size justifications and
apologies. Enough I say.
